Let’s get acquainted, my name is Mary – I am a happy mother of two wonderful children and the author of articles on the site.
Children are the greatest source of happiness in the world! You start understanding it especially well when becoming pregnant fails for months or years.
I became pregnant with my son almost 6 years after the start of planning. I had to wait for my daughter another 5 years more.
I have consulted gynecologists, surgeons and doctors at the family planning center. I’ve investigated thousands of basal body temperature charts. I’ve also re-read a good number of happy stories, looked through a lot of comments in hopes of seeing two stripes someday myself. And I’m a mom now))
How to realize your dream
You want to have a baby. I understand you perfectly well and support you! Let me make your task easier. This site contains all the necessary information on determining the most favorable time for conceiving. This knowledge has helped me to become a mom.
- How to understand your cycle?
- When does ovulation occur and how to calculate it?
- What symptoms clearly indicate that your fertile days have started?
- When is the best time to make love to get the best chance of pregnancy?
- When are the best days to plan a boy or girl and a lot of more information.
Everyone has their own recipe for successful pregnancy.
We are all different, different cycle lengths, lifestyles, different conditions of the body and medical illnesses. And everyone has one goal – a successful pregnancy!
All the knowledge gained in the planning process has formed the basis of my articles. I tried to collect the most important and useful things to help everyone who wants to determine the days when the chances of impregnation are the highest. To help to analyze the possible difficulties and to tip off about how to behave better.
If you just started planning
So, you are a beginner and do not know anything about fertile days, basal temperature, ovulation tests and just started planning your baby – read the article on ovulation and the menstrual cycle. However, I recommend you to first visit a gynecologist and take a spermogram.
What is it for?
To give birth to a healthy child you need to be healthy yourself. Now imagine a miracle has happened – fertilization has happened, and at that moment you have inflammation of the appendages. As a result, the mobility of the cilia in the tubes is disturbed and because of this, the future embryo will not enter the uterus. An ectopic pregnancy will occur.
There are many other factors that can negatively affect bearing.
The spermogram is needed for this reason. How many childless couples do you think are male factors? About 40%! Now tell me, what reason for the absence of children of a couple is easier, cheaper and faster to identify:
- problems with sperm.
- violation of the uterine tubes patency (HSG or laparoscopy).
- anovulation (tests for hormones, folliculometry, etc.). Surely to start with, it is more rational and cheaper to exclude the male factor.
Approximate Planning Preparation Program
If everything with sperm is in order – don’t spend money for the ovulation examination and tube patency at once. This procedure is better to do when there is a chance of commissures in the pelvis.
A healthy couple may need a full year of active planning for a successful conceivement. My recommendation for anyone who is just starting out:
- First, to exclude the male factor (if sperm results are low, to be treated).
- To have a physical examination yourself (untreated sexually-transmitted diseases, acute inflammations and infections).
- To kick the bad habits for both partners and to start taking the vitamins. Women need obligatory folic acid of 5 mg/day.
- To start active planning (SI (sexual intercourse) every two to three days) every cycle. On the day of ovulation, you can make a control SI.
- At the same time, I advise you to determine with the help of a basogram whether ovulation is generally occurring and if the level of hormones is normal.
Ovulation can be determined without fundamental investments using the ovulation tests or basal body temperature (BBT) measurements. If you have financial resources – it is better to go for folliculometry. This way you will find out if you have problems with fertility and with the help of your gynecologist you will quickly start the treatment.
If you can’t get pregnant for more than a year
If you are under 35, then 12 months is a perfectly acceptable time for a healthy couple to become pregnant. If 35+ – six unsuccessful months is enough and a more thorough examination should be done.
The most common problems (it was them that my doctor and I have examined and treated):
- no ovulation or malfunction with ovulation;
- complete or partial tubal obstruction;
- sperm has a low ability to fertilize;
- psychosomatics (a psychological factor is assumed when all the others are excluded).
And there are many other reasons.
My advice(!): Address only those experts whom you trust. The fact is that there is an invisible connection between the result of treatment and the level of your confidence in the doctor. If you are not sure about your gynecologist (reproductologist), you will always doubt his prescriptions, recommendations, treatment regimens, etc.
If you doubt – your subconscious mind immediately implements negative attitudes. If you trust a specialist who is confident in a positive result – your subconscious realizes the positive effect of treatment.
Follow all the instructions and appointments with the obligatory belief in your fast pregnancy.
Love yourself more!
There are so many reasons to despair and get angry with yourself (your body), with your husband, doctors, people around when you can’t get pregnant.
I went through this circle of hope / impatient expectation / sorrowful disappointment month after month, year after year. And you know that the first time I became pregnant only then, when I stopped speaking negative words, and began to pronounce attitudes and affirmations as if in advance, ahead of time, attracting a new reality.
Here are my favorites:
- I easily become pregnant and give birth to healthy and happy children
- I bear a baby excellent
- I have regular ovulation
- I always find the best moment to conceive
- I love my baby
- I am a happy person
- I love myself and am thankful for my strong and healthy body
A very important point is to become happy now, and not when a certain condition (pregnancy) is reached. Baby comes to a happy mom and dad.
My story(!): At first I literally made myself say and think positive things about life. What a nonsense? Then, it became a habit to try to see only the good around. Then I became convinced that I would become 100% pregnant. And I got pregnant!
From the very beginning, I had problems with the cycle. Amenorrhea, then oligomenorrhea, when menstruation comes very rarely. Further, the diagnosis of PCOS is polycystic ovary syndrome. In addition, there was one abdominal operation – appendicitis. There was also inflammation of the appendages – and as a result the chronic adnexitis, bilateral oophoritis.
Interesting to know (!) As the gynecologist explained to me, any surgical interventions of this kind, acute inflammatory diseases of the abdominal cavity and pelvic organs lead to the formation of commissures. And they pull together,tissue, squeeze, sometimes even merge the tubes (in whole or in part). As a result, obstruction is complete or partial.
With this bunch of diagnosments, I have started planning and it is not surprising that none of this came out. The year was wasted. I went for an examination. I received an appointment for anti-inflammatory treatment, and then for HSG (I did not do this). Again, unsuccessful planning.
I went to another doctor. Here I needed a semen analysis (spermogram). The results were not so good, and even prostatitis. Again, several courses of treatment for me and my spouse that really helped to improve the quality of sperm. But there was no pregnancy.
I have changed the doctor again, and I have again undergone the treatment for inflammation and physical procedures with my husband. Only the cycles were as unstable as before – drank OC (oral contraceptives) to improve the situation, and the problem was repeated again and again. A cyst has grown – one, this is now the second. I was afraid to be operated on and continued my meaningless planning.
Another year passed when I finally decided on laparoscopy.
A new world(!): I have rebuilt my way of thinking, attitude to the situation and events. I tuned in for a positive result. I thanked the doctors in advance for the good work and my body for the pregnancy. I praised and supported myself. I’ve changed my job and tried to become happy here and now.
You should never stop being an optimist! The second pregnancy was also not easy. The only difference is that the cycle after the first birth was restored and became regular. It was then that I knew how to feel my ovulation and knew when the best time to conceive was. I learned to feel the ovulation well.
My diagnoses remained the same: adnexitis and commissure in the pelvis. I tried to get pregnant again and nothing worked for a year and a half. Paratubal cyst was also added.
Сommissures(!): The doctor told me that a woman has about a year after dissecting the old commissures until the new ones form. Plus – just a little stress, adverse conditions – the inflammation of the appendages returns.
This was followed by courses of anti-inflammatory therapy and laparoscopy again: removal of a cyst, dissection of commissures, than Fallopian Tube Patency Test (one turned out to be good).
At the same time I was working on my psychological state. Forever tired, not enough sleep, worn out, has seen nothing but the walls around, it is difficult to stay positive every moment, even with a small treasure close by. Endometriosis has begun.
Time passed, but nothing changed. I was afraid that I would not be able to get pregnant the second time (at that time I was already 33 years old). Even Dydrogesterone, upon which I had so many hopes, did not help me…
Search for a new meaning of life and the new hobbies
I went to work. I decided to develop myself and find a new passion in my life. At first it was hard, a huge stress for the body – subacute thyroiditis has begun.
Months of steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (the disease didn’t want to leave). And finally, the second pregnancy came on the sixth cycle after the finish of treatment!